


So Serious

by Sashataakheru



Series: Strange Magic [9]
Category: Electric Light Orchestra
Genre: Angst, Begging, Collars, D/s, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-24
Updated: 2011-10-24
Packaged: 2017-10-24 22:18:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/268483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sashataakheru/pseuds/Sashataakheru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He'd seen it coming, but somehow, he wasn't prepared for it. What's he supposed to do when he discovers things could be a hell of a lot better than they have been? Set 1977.</p>
            </blockquote>





	So Serious

Hugh had seen the signs. He'd always known he was never the only one in Jeff's heart. It was part of the reason they rarely played together anymore. He'd met someone else, the prick, and Hugh was feeling neglected. He said nothing, though, because Jeff had told him not to. He felt that if he lived with him, he'd have left already. As it was, he was left on his own, running errands for him anyway, even though he knew he had better things to do.

He wasn't sure exactly when it had started to get like this. Sure, Jeff still played with him when they were in the studio, maybe when they were having a break, but that was it. Jeff had grown to be unbearable on tour, and not even a quick session before or after a gig helped his mood. Hugh had done his best, though. He'd done his best to cheer up his master; he felt it was his job more than anyone else's, and if truth be told, the rest of the band were more than willing to let him have it.

Their last tour had been the most exhausting one he'd ever been on. Everyone had got sick at some point, and all it had done was make Jeff irretrievably grumpy. He could cheer up enough to put on a good show, never let it be said he disappointed the fans, but the façade came crumbling down offstage. Hugh had tried his best, he had crept into Jeff's hotel room and tried to make him happy, he'd even offered to care for him when he was sick, but Jeff usually just told him to fuck off. Hugh spent a lot of time sleeping alone.

It had been a long three years. In some ways, Hugh was surprised the result of a drunken outburst had lasted that long. He hadn't set out to pursue a relationship with him when he'd told him that back in '74. But Jeff had gone with it, dammit, and then he'd offered him a proper collar and Hugh found he had everything he wanted.

But that wasn't the problem. By coincidence, he'd run into an old friend in Munich of all places, and he'd taken him home to play with his mistress. Hugh had never been to another house where they lived like master and servant before, but as soon as he stepped inside, he knew what he had with Jeff was so very wrong.

Mistress had invited him in to play, and there was just something so very different about the way she handled him than how Jeff did things. She made her authority clear right from the start, and he willingly submitted to her. She showed him around their house: where her sub slept, where he ate, the rules they both were to abide by, and their toy room.

Something was stirring inside him. Hugh couldn't shake it. Mistress sat him down as they talked, and it dawned on Hugh that that was what he really wanted. He wanted to live fulltime as a submissive, not just be Jeff's plaything on the increasingly rare occasions when he was in the mood.

"The sub reflects the Domme, Hugh, and if I were to make a judgement on your behaviour right now? I'd say your Dom ain't very good," she'd said.

Hugh didn't deny it, as much as he hated speaking ill of his master. He knew it was true. Jeff was a shitty master, and he deserved much better than that. He wanted a cage to sleep in, he wanted rules, and a leash, and someone to train him properly. That was really what he wanted.

That realisation left him humiliated and bereft of comfort. He'd put up with Jeff's shit for so long because he hadn't known any better. He'd been too besotted with him to question it. But now he did know better. What the hell was he supposed to do now?

* * *

He'd been home for four days since coming back from Germany. Jeff had called, he was sure of it, but he hadn't answered the phone. Hadn't wanted to. He'd just sat in his room, holding Jeff's collar in his hands. He wasn't sure what to do. Break up with him? Try and fix things? Show him how it should be done? How could he be sure Jeff would even respond to that?

Someone was pounding on the door of his flat. Hugh ignored it. Jeff started pleading with him. Hugh wanted to smack him.

"Come on, Hugh, what's wrong? Can we talk? Do I need to make that an order?"

"No, you fucking do not," Hugh muttered.

He set the collar aside and went to let him in before he disturbed the neighbours. Opening the door, Jeff stood there, looking half concerned and half like he wanted to laugh at him. Hugh wasn't sure what to make of that.

"What do you want?" Hugh said.

Jeff shifted, his expression becoming more serious. "I've been trying t'call you, but you won't answer. Is everything alright? Only I was going to-"

"Shut up, Jeff. We're not playing right now, so I can tell you to fuck off if I want," Hugh said spitefully.

Hugh almost shut the door on him, but Jeff pushed his way in. Knowing they had to talk anyway, Hugh didn't immediately throw him out. He shut the door.

"I know you don't give a shit about me anymore. I've seen you with her, you know. She owns your heart now, not me. I'm beginning to wonder if I ever did," Hugh said softly.

Jeff looked at him. He had the gall to look apologetic. He reached for Hugh's hand, but Hugh pulled away, not wanting to be near him.

"Look, I'm sorry, alright? I jus'-"

Hugh took a moment to steady his breath before he spoke. "I've done everything you've ever asked me to do. I've been loyal, I've been obedient, I've even done all the shit jobs you can't be arsed doing yourself. The shit jobs you usually pay someone else to do, you lazy bastard. But I can't do this anymore. I've seen how it's supposed to be, and this isn't it. You don't respect me, you just treat me like a worthless slave. You don't understand why I submit to you, do you? You don't understand why I need this. Do you get it, Jeff? Do you really understand me?"

"But I thought - this is what you want, isn't it? I thought this was what you wanted. Why isn't it enough anymore?" Jeff said, surprised.

"No, it isn't what I want. I don't want you to give me endless jobs to do. I need your discipline, and I'm beginning to doubt you really understand what that means. You just- " Hugh paused, gathering his thoughts. "You've been a calming influence in my life. I need that steady hand of authority, the right authority, to keep me grounded. You did that. You helped me steer clear of a lot of bad trouble. You silenced that voice in my head that always says yes. This isn't just about the sex. This isn't just about playing with you every now and then, where you get to do things to me and get one off at the same time. It goes far beyond that. Can't you understand that? I don't want to end this. I'm terrified of ending it because I'm not sure I'm ready to be on my own yet. But I don't know if you're willing to help make this work. You can't just disappear on me once we've finished playing, or even when we haven't finished yet. I need aftercare, Jeff, and it's fucking disrespectful and negligent for you to just leave me tied up while you go work on a song for hours on end. I won't put up with that shit anymore. We need to talk more often. But if you're not willing to make this work, maybe I should just cut my losses and go. It's not like anyone would notice, right?"

Jeff didn't reply. He walked over to the window, then back to Hugh. Hugh wasn't sure what he was thinking. Jeff vanished into his bedroom, returning a moment later with his collar. He hesitated, then unbuckled the collar. Hugh watched as he secured it around his neck and knelt at his feet.

"I'm sorry, Hugh. I'm sorry if I've misunderstood these things. But you knew I was inexperienced. You knew that. Maybe it's time you taught me again. Showed me what you really need. I like it when you behave, and I don't want to lose you. I do care about you, even if I don't always say it. I was never good at that sort of thing. I want to try and fix things, if you're willing to let me," Jeff said, looking up at him.

Hugh wasn't sure what to think of any of that. Part of him believed Jeff was telling the truth, but he knew what Jeff was like, or at least he thought he did. Jeff could be a selfish bastard who often seemed ignorant of anyone else's needs.

"Don't - don't do this, Jeff. Take that off. Just sit down beside me and listen. I mean, properly listen too, don't just pretend to listen and then only do what you think you've heard me say. If this is going to work, I need you to really take in what I need. Otherwise, take your collar and get the fuck out of my house," Hugh said.

Hugh went into the lounge, waiting for Jeff. He half hoped he'd leave, so he wouldn't have to talk to him. Soon enough, though, Jeff came and sat beside him, collar in hand. He couldn't bring himself to look at Hugh. Hugh still wanted to smack him.

* * *

It had taken all afternoon. Hugh had done his best to explain what he needed. Jeff had struggled to understand what it was he got out of submission, and was hesitant to swap places with him to find out. Hugh hadn't been all that surprised. He wasn't sure Jeff had a submissive bone in his body. He was too much of a control freak. He had to have everything under control. While it did have its benefits when he was in a good mood, when he wasn't, Hugh never wanted to be around him. He was pleased he had his own place; he wasn't sure he could stand living with him.

But Hugh was hopeful nonetheless. Jeff seemed to get it this time, and they'd taken the time to set some rules and boundaries for the next time they got together. Jeff promised this time it would work, now that he understood what it was Hugh wanted from him. Hugh, in spite of his misgivings, was willing to let him try again. His fear of being out on his own when he wasn't sure he was ready to cope with that just yet overrode his concerns that Jeff wouldn't change at all and that they'd be back in the same place in a couple of years' time, having the same arguments.

And it did seem to work. Jeff organised set dates for them, even if they sometimes needed rescheduling because of unforeseen events. The time they spent together was better than it had ever been. There were rules, and boundaries, written up in a contract, to remind themselves of what they'd agreed to. Hugh insisted on that so Jeff couldn't claim ignorance. Jeff even seemed willing to attempt to give him proper aftercare, particularly if it had been an intense session. Spending an hour or two in subspace, no matter what they did, usually required some time to come back down again.

They even talked, and at considerable length. While hesitant and unsure as to why Hugh would pick Jeff as someone he wanted to emulate, he did attempt to teach him. After the crash, they had managed to recover, and Hugh was just as devoted to him as he had been before, his faith in his master restored as he took care of him properly. He was determined it was going to work this time, no matter what.


End file.
